Conspiracy theories: Cracked

Wow, the stupid just won't stop. Again, Cracked has made a nice handy chart for you to compare. The funny thing is, you can do this for virtually every conspiracy there is. But they won't ever let actual facts get in the way of their beliefs. Sure seems to be a lot of that crap going around.

Conspiracy theorists got a celebrity endorsement last week when Whoopi Goldberg questioned the Moon Landing on "The View." If only she'd consulted our handy 'People Who Would Have to Be Full of Shit' conspiracy theory chart ...

The Balance of Proof. It varies if you're a dog person.

Just The Facts

1. The average conspiracy theorist will argue with NASA, Nobel-prize winners and every expert in the world despite having fewer qualifications than the average fry cook.
2. Conspiracy theorists view logical argument as cheating.
3. Like pissing fetishes and tentacle rape comics, conspiracy theories are a problem made much worse by the Internet.
4. Never assume malice when incompetence will do.

An Ego Issue

Conspiracy theorists divide the world into "Everyone even remotely involved/qualified vs. Me," and decide that they'll win single-handedly. They're like Rambo with bullshit instead of bullets.

They tend to enjoy the ego-boost that comes with thinking of oneself as the only intelligent objector in a world of sheeple. When the government has to spend billions of dollars shuttling Elvis from Roswell to the Bermuda Triangle and back in black helicopters before you can feel good about yourself, you've got to be pretty tragic.

Shadowy Organizations

Conspiracy theorists believe the world is run by schizophrenic shadowy organizations who - despite conspiring with millions in perfect silence - can't resist putting clues in things like major public monuments and every note of currency ever printed. Making the average Batman villain look like Professor Moriarty.

At the last count the world was secretly being run by the Illuminati, Knights Templar, Freemasons, Trilateral commission, New World Order, Skull & Bones society, Bilderberg group, Nine Unknown Men and the ever-popular Jews. It's unknown whether they all vote on various issues or just ask Dan Brown whose turn it is each week. Conspiracy theorists honestly believe that these invisible elites have run thousands of years of history but are incapable of killing someone who lives in a basement and shouts on street corners.

Conspiracy Theorist Abilities

Conspiracy theorists display incredible attention to detail, an even more incredible ability to ignore details they don't like, obsessive focus and a complete absence of social skills. Every time a new crazy decides that Bush brought down World Trade Center, anime loses a powerful Pokemaster.

Conspiracy Theories Articles

Was 9/11 an Inside Job? Submitted by: LukeMcKinney | Jul 24, 2009

No, you goddamn idiot.

The Shady Agenda Behind 5 Popular Conspiracy Theories Submitted by: LukeMcKinney | Jul 24, 2009

Even when there is a conspiracy the theorists are wrong.

7 Insane Conspiracies That Actually Happened Submitted by: LukeMcKinney | Jul 24, 2009

You don't need to make up crazy stuff.

Rotten.com Library- Conspiracies Submitted by: Samwise | Dec 20, 2008

A good compendium of some of the more major conspiracies, usually centered around American political hijinx.

Whirlwind and more Braindroppings

Whew, what a weekend. When I got home from class (early) on Friday, my wife suggested that my daughter and I go to Disney for the weekend. Just for fun, and because I haven't really had a chance to spend a lot of time with my daughter because of deployments and such. We had a great time just hanging out and doing stuff together. it was an incredibly enjoyable weekend! Although, both of us were pissed that Space Mountain was closed until this winter. Grrr. We both also decided that if you go to Orlando for rides and stuff, the place to go is Universal. Overall it's probably a more active place than Disney. Disney is more about atmosphere really I think.

So, on my Facts, not Fantasy page, I quoted the UBS Freethinkers on a blog post, and they have decided to talk to me about that in a podcast. I think this is my first podcast ever! Kind of cool really. Hopefully I can get more traffic an information out about the site. I did see that IVAN3MAN put up a couple of news stories in the blog as I was in the land of mouse, and that was very nice of him. I still am looking for more folks to assist in this web site project. I'd like to see this become a frequently utilized resource by students and laypeople around the world. Please spread the news about Facts, not Fantasy!

Okay, all I got for today. Still catching up from playing hookie this weekend!

Need for HTML Help and Authors...

I am working on this Facts, not fantasy site, and I am having a hell of a time figuring out some formatting issues... Why is the text so small in the comment boxes of the blog? Why is it so small on most of the pages? What happened to all my beautiful formatting? Oh well, I guess I have some time to figure that out. It's just frustrating!

Speaking of that page, I am soliciting other authors. If you have some time, and ability, please help out the cause. We're trying to get this movement some momentum since there seems to be a tidal wave of crap out there in need of countering.

Facts, not Fantasy!

Who hoo! We are getting a start for a collection of information for the "Facts, not Fantasy" page. It's only a start, and I am still trying to figure out a great number of things, but now we have a place in the world wide web. This is a resource for all who want to fight the anti-vax pro-disease nutters out there. Feel free to copy and paste the info on there and place it wherever you want.

The page still needs some work, but we are at a start. Right now, the main focus of the page has the vaccine/autism link information on it. It has a very basic start on the evolution information, but that is nowhere near ready. The FAQ and Links page aren't ready yet either, but those aren't nearly as difficult to put finishing touches on as pages with a great deal of content.

Some things that I want to do is enable comments (only for people who wish to register of course). We'll do our best to not actually moderate the comments there, but we will make fools out of those who come in there and spread lies or use anecdotes.

I also need to work on a graphic for the page to get rid of that "Optimus" thing... Not even sure what that's about!

Later the page will be a resource for both the Vaccine/Autism crowd, as well as the Evolution/Creationist debate. Check back often. And if you want to help on this project, feel free to drop me a line.